No butterfly should be denied its wings.
Tuesday, 01/22/02 - 8:02 pm.

There's a line on this Aerosmith song, Joanie's Butterfly, that says: no butterfly should be denied its wings. As a matter of fact, I was listening to it today.

I hate my parents. I'm sorry, it sounds bad. But I do. Or to be less hard on them, I just can't stand living with them anymore.

Today I went with them to the mall. They had to buy some shit, I had to buy some shit, for school. In the car, I said:

- Dad, can you buy me a CD? (as a birthday present, since they said I should go and pick what I wanted).

- Mom: A CD? Didn't you buy loads in Houston? You've got so many already [sider note: the whole Aerosmith collection, one tribute to Aerosmith, Elmopalooza! and three burned CDs. I only buy CDs when Aerosmith's come out...and as you may have guessed, it's not often.]

- No, I did not. Well, just one.

- Dad: Don't buy distractors, school is about to begin. Better get something for school [*blah, blah, blah....*]..

P>

- Dad, it's not like I listen to my CDs 24/7. It's not a distractor, I know what my priorities are, I....

Then -to keep this short and sweet- he basically told me to shut up. Of course, I had forgotten....do not answer grown-ups, they're always right.

FUCK YOU!!! FUCK THE BOTH OF YOU, JERKS!!!!

I just wanted Jagged Little Pill. And it's not like I'm dying for it, but I kept crying in silence the whole afternoon, over my parents' locked mind. I mean, c'mon....how could such thing as a CD affect my life as a student? Even Aerosmith's CDs haven't had that effect on me, and you know how much I love Aerosmith. I found my dad's arguments plainly stupid and meaningless.

So we were going around the mall, I had to buy my miserable shirts for my uniform. Of course I was so mad that I couldn't hide it, and dad just mumbled: you can't tell 'em anything and they get mad just like that. My mom was the one who was talking to the salesclerks, as if I was 5 years old and unable to know what size I am, much less to talk to one of those people.

Before we left, he told me to go to the second floor and look for the CD. I said no, I don't want it, but when we got there, I didn't even bother looking and said it was not there.

I DON'T NEED YOUR FUCKIN' PITY, IDIOT!!!!!!

While dad was in the bank, I went with my mom to look for an alarm clock for me. Good thing I had money with me, because she didn't. So I bought two, mine and one for Carlos.

WITH MY MONEY...SEE PARENTS? I'M NOT STUPID!!!!!! I CAN HAVE MONEY WITHOUT LOSING IT OR WASTING IT IN CRAP!!!!!!

BY that time, dad was softer on me, but I swear to God I was as mad, or even madder. That was it. Mom told him about the clocks and he gently tried to gave me what I'd spent on those. He does that all time. Under normal circumstances, I'd have gladly accept it but there'll be no more normal circumstances. I've had it. I just said: no, keep it. I bought these for *me*, they're *mine*.

I DON'T WANT TO LIVE WITH YOU ANYMORE, I'M SICK OF YOU, YOU TREAT ME LIKE I'M A FUCKIN' RETARDED!!!!!!!!!!!

There's some heartless people who catch butterflies and clip their wings to a cardboard just because. Sometimes, if the butterly is still alive, it tries to scape and its wings rip off.

No butterfly should be denied its wings.

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