The only one reason to be embarrased of my parents.
Saturday, 05/21/05 - 5:11 pm.

I'm updating early because tonight the sound of music will be on. The hills are alive, etc. I LOVE that movie.

My Latinamerican Literature midterm is on monday. Tuesday, I have the regular 4 o'clock meeting (my job, yay). On friday I have the Social Psychology midterm. Sounds like I have a lot of spare time, but that's not the case. In fact, right now, I'm waiting for Irene to send me two documents, so I can finish the papers one due on monday, the other on tuesday.

My biggest concern, however, is finding a spot of time to see Joseph. I think about him all the time, and today I felt bad for being so submissive regarding my parents. I hate the way they are...Joseph's mom received me with a smile when she met me, whereas my dad received Joseph with a frightening "will you be coming over often?".

This is probably the one time I've felt embarrassed of my parents. I mean, in my relationship with Joseph in general. Instead of feeling at least a tad happy for me, they judged him. And you know what else? They always ask me where I'm going, but they never asked my brothers. They'd grab the keys and say "I'm going out". My dad would only answer ok, and ask some random question, like "are you coming back for dinner?". Don't give me the damn "they care about you" line, I know that. But they're still caring for the 10 year-old version of me.

My parents were invited to some lunch this afternoon. Then my sister came to drop off my nephew so I'd take care of him while she went for lunch. I didn't even know she would bring him. I said "everybody goes out except me...I will start going out". Well, about time, she said. Because she isn't like my parents. Actually, she's been my parents' headache (not that they ever rejected her in any way, but she was able to break out from their chains since she was very young...and let's forget the single-mom episode). I wish she still lived here, I know she'd support me completely.

Oh, hey...speaking of siblings, my eldest brother (in Houston) turns thirty...something today. Thirty six? Good grief! He found toilet paper all over his backyard this morning, but it turned out it was directed to my niece Rebeca. She's 11 years old, what the fuck is she getting into already?

So, anyway...I plan on seeing Joseph this week. I really need to start standing up for myself.

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