"Something real you did..."
Wednesday, 04/12/06 - 8:30 pm.

Ice Age 2 cracked me up. Damn, I wish I were that clever, to come up with stories like that one. I didn't like the beggining, but it picked up. My sister and nephew took me to the movies, yay.

And then I was going to see Fun With Dick and Jane (I love Jim Carrey) at 4:40 with Joseph in the afternoon. But I picked him up at work and he said we couldn't do it, because he had a meeting at 6 and didn't think we'd be on time. It pissed me off, he could've called me and told me. I drove aimlessly when we got to the mall's parking lot, because on top of everything, it's Holy Week, it's vacation and the mall was packed. At least in the morning my sister found a spot.

We didn't have any other place to go, so he suggested his house. I was reluctant, really mad at him for leaving me hanging, but I still drove there. He didn't even tell me I wasn't parked properly in front of his house (sometimes I still have trouble with it), out of fear that I would explode.

All right. He apologized for failing me and hugged me. I was mad, but it wasn't the end of the world, so I hugged back. And surprise, I wasn't mad anymore. He offered to watch a movie, but we ended up doing other stuff.

He didn't have condoms, and that meant intercourse was out of the question. For me, actually. He didn't insist. This time, finally, it was about him. It had always been about me. He was concerned for a while, saying he felt selfish for not giving me anything. But believe me, I was enjoying myself, as much as he was enjoying it all. This time I didn't have the pressure of an inminent intercourse (which I feel like having, most of the time, but as soon as it starts I get terrified), and it was great to learn that I DO have some skills at that.

So we spent a couple of hours in bed, playing (in many ways) and talking. We're thinking of waiting a few years to have children after we're married, so we can have time for ourselves.

- Me: and travel! I want to travel.
- Him: yeah, well...I'm afraid that phase already came and went for me. I did my traveling when I was a youngster.
- Me: but it's not the same. You'll point at every stamp on your passport: "look, we've fucked here, too".
- Him: ......ok, now you have learned to manipulate me. I love you, marry me now.

I was upset by the change of plans, but the afternoon couldn't have turned better if planned. And as Calvin's dad once said, now you have memories of something real you did, instead of something fake you watched.

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