Tuesday, 10/24/06 - 10:25 pm.
I feel nothing when I step into my old school. Or rather, I feel some intrapsychic resistance, because it's no use feeling nostalgic, it's no use remembering something that's long over. I saw Fidel and Charlie today, when I went to school to pick up my nephew. Always nice, but things change.
My nephew's finishing 4th grade. Tomorrow it's his last day. He was going to go off with some of his friends afterwards and have a sleepover, but he failed to accomplish studying properly and my sister told him he wasn't going. It breaks my heart, but he's also far from having that little voice of responsability.
I had to wait for him for 45 minutes today. He went to play soccer with his friends, and he lost track of time. I was pissed off, but didn't say much (anyway, later my mom and dad said he was very inconsiderate). He was embarrassed, and I hate seeing him like that; he's a nice, kind, sweet, smart kid. Ok, but also irresponsable. I'm very ambivalent, but I'd rather not be so hard on him. He's got his mom for that.
On other news, I have my own share of problems. Ok, so they're not "problems", because I don't need solutions. Call them conflicts, or whatever. I lost part of a grade, because Michelle didn't notice she didn't print the last part of a paper; I was really, really mad at her. Then, Joseph was a little bitchy last night; nothing to do with me, but still, right now I don't feel like talking to him. Anyway, he's playing Maple, which is his new obsession, so it takes too long for him to reply to my messages.
I wish he did something. He's got this job, but you can't make a living out of it long-term. He's very, very, very, very defensive on the subject, but maybe I'll bring it up next time I see him. Seriously. He oughtta learn some real skills.
Since I won't talk to him, I should go study for my Psychological Treatment midterm. I love clinical psychology, but it's so, so, so, so hard. I hate it when people say psychology is easy and everybody has good averages and you only choose that career because there's no math in it. Bullshit, I'd like to see them fighting with the statistical package, and having their shoes covered in mud after every trip to the community...and it's not just listening! Fuck, I'm sick of that myth. In clinical psychology (let's not mention the other areas) you have to do so much at once, in your head, with your body language, because you're providing a service, you're providing a relationship different from any other that the person has ever had, because in this one, he or she has to change and face his/her own obstacles. We don't have nor give answers, and we're not doing this to feel good about ourselves. It's a job, it's just that the subject you work on it's fragile and rigid at the same time.
Whew. Now that I got that out of my chest, I shall get going.
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