A near break-up and the importance of not forcing.
Wednesday, 09/05/07 - 9:51 pm.

I missed the 6th anniversary of this diary, on september 1st. I've been gone because my computer couldn't handle Linux and it was so dirty inside it wouldn't start. I was going to archive august, but I only wrote a grand total of five times. I think I'll merge two months, then. However, the noticeable decrease in the number of posts doesn't really mean I'm dropping this habit. I just don't have the same time nor energy. Anyways, happy anniversary, diary!!!

Let's pick it up from where I left: after getting mad at Joseph, one of my veins burst. No, really. I developed a funny red dot in my eye, and it's just starting to fade. Nothing serious, I'd heard about it but never happened to me. I'd consider it happened because I was mad. And I stayed mad, until I decided I'd go look for him and work things out, because he wouldn't do it.

I'll make it short, because it took us about two hours and a half to solve it. The first two hours and 15 minutes was just a filler, tears and silence, and a few meaningful words. He never left the bed. The rest of the time, I asked a key question, and we cleared it out. We were very close to breaking up, but it didn't happen.

In fact, I'm really glad that, even though he was mad at me for a few things, he got the gist of my argument. He understood I didn't feel entirely respected when it came to sex, and he said he'd tried to change. I can tell it takes a lot of effort from him, but I honestly appreciate that, because I wasn't comfortable, and I told him so.

Speaking of sex, my friend Michelle told me she was sexually abused as a child. That's two people I know, and since the first one told me, I've wondered how many people I know have gone through that and keep it quiet (of course it's not something you'd like to shout to everybody). That subjects scares me endlessly, and yet I can't seem to stop approaching it.

I'm tired so I can't elaborate (I've been having trouble with the computer the entire day). I'll be back soon.

By the way, I had the day off today. Because of hurricane Felix. But it barely rained here. Never happens much in the city, but it does out in the country, so I'm embracing myself in case volunteers are needed within a few days.

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