Wednesday, 04.16.2014 - 8:45 pm.
It feels as though it's been longer than five days since I last wrote in here. By now I guess my blood levels are back to normal and guess what? My dizziness has been gone since then!
I think it had to do with the scare after donating blood. "Say, maybe I'm not eating right", i.e. enough. Indeed, I only ate three times day, which is not very smart, considering I work a lot. Granted, it's not physical work but still it's very demanding. I stuck to eating three times a day trying to control my weight gain a good while ago, but a lot of time goes on in between meals.
So there you go, I get to have one or two snacks a day: fruit, peanuts, coffee. Maybe it's just a placebo, maybe it's the real deal, but I've felt more motivated and with more energy the last couple of days.
I've also been so busy that I've gone one week without exercising. I have spent that time (usually 45 to 60 minutes, including routine and shower) working, and it's paid off in terms of getting work done. But last night I couldn't breathe properly, an odd sensation of having air stuck in my lungs and stomach. I got rid of that since I started to exercise and I did not appreciate it coming back, it's a bad sign. So today I came home from class, exhausted, but I turned to good ol' Billy Blanks and I felt nice and accomplished. Even more exhausted, but for a good cause.
Speaking of exhaustion, from monday to wednesday, Andrew and I have the worst schedule. He teaches the first two days and I teach the third, today (at different universities). Him all afternoon, me all morning. But we're making it work really well, supporting each other, taking care of the meals while the other is busy. It's really great, I couldn't ask for a better partner for life than he is. And I'm glad he says the same about me. This thing of mixing romance and partnership is quite awesome.
The madness is gone, at least until next week. Right now we're both in bed after having supper, relaxing. It's only tomorrow left, we get Good Friday off. It's Holy Week, I keep forgetting. I associated this time to my family and to a week-long holiday so it doesn't make that much sense anymore, without them and working most of the week. I'm a believer but not a formal one, I guess, one who attends mass and follows all rituals. My mom is not happy about this and I'm sorry she hurts so much over this; I realized this last time I spoke to her on the phone. She shouldn't, I'm still a good person, I pray (I reflect/ feel grateful/ ask for help/ hope for good things) and I try to be useful to the world as much as I can.
One or two days after my last entry, I dreamed Joseph and I got married. It was the weirdest thing. The dream intertwined with other narratives but it stands out the fact that we were at the wedding reception and he and I did not interact. I think I was drawing something from a comment CR made back in the day, "He and Mrs. Smith didn't even dance at their own wedding!". He thought that was a bad sign.
So anyway, next thing in my dream, I'm writing a blog post (in my personal, public, non-anonymous blog, which exists in real life) that started kind of like this: "even though we were getting married, he had already made up his mind about breaking up with me". I was writing that blog post as a newly single gal. I did think about continuing that post in real life in the same blog. I woke up and continued writing it in my head, but as soon as I shook off the drowsiness, I moved on to my daily stuff.
Oh, hey, my Nephew #2 turned 18 two days ago! He started college this year and he's a hoot, always has been. I miss my nephews and my niece and the baby niece I haven't met. I wish I had money to fly them here for at least a couple of weeks. Andrew and I are thinking about traveling to Houston in december and spend Christmas with my family, which would be the awesomest thing ever, and I get excited just to think about it. Hopefully our finances will be on our side. We are working hard (each of us has three jobs) and maybe, hopefully, we'll make some profit out of our wedding. Trololololol.