Sunday, 12.20.2015 - 5:54 pm.
I feel it's been a long time since I last updated, much more than a week. And even so, I don't feel like I have much to tell other than I'm excited over Christmas but I'm dreading Wednesday, the one-year mark of Andrew's brother's death. I know I've been mentioning it every week for a while but it's because it is a horrible thing approaching and soon there'll be no other choice but to face it.
Andrew, I guess, will make his best effort to carry on, like last year. It was weird, although natural and understandable, how life just kept going on after getting the news. We had Christmas dinner with his family and we opened presents because that's what you do around these days. It was like trying to maintain the minimal normalcy and sanity, to try to live on a different astral plane for a while and avoid feeling this killer pain because there isn't anything you can do to stop it.
Jesus.
On non-sad news, we have our gifts ready. I think Andrew got me a Globe, because he knows I've been wanting one for years, and one of these days when we came home from work (we're PhD students but it's more like a job than the usual studying) there was a huge, round box from Amazon and he acted like...well, that was for me so I wasn't supposed to look at it. But whatever it is, it is fine. I'm more excited about him opening the presents I got him, although none of them match what he asks for, as in, "if you haven't gotten me a present yet, cotton socks would be great". Or a fancy, lounge-ish chair, but there's no room for one of those in the house so I don't feel that bad about not getting it.
I also keep myself entertained with the idea of bringing Nephew #3 to study music here. I have detailed a proposal for my sister and him, he could go to one of those colleges that have a 2-year long program (if he's interested in it), it is much more affordable than the university and it may also open the doors for him to attend later on. And of course he'd live with us and that'd be awesome. More on that later though, as my sister and nephew still have a lot to discuss between them about his future.
I will sorely miss my family these holidays: parents, siblings, nephews and nieces. And my closest friends. But I'm comforted by the fact that I have a little family of my own and that makes me happy.
Have a merry Christmas (or any other holiday), dear Dlanders!!!
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