Saturday, 12.30.2017 - 3:40 pm.
It's been a fantastic couple of weeks, and I'm not quite looking forward to the vacation ending. It was just Andrew and me at home, each of us on our own business, him gaming and me reading/writing/drawing. But it was bliss filling in those activities with us coming together for nice meals, cool conversations, great sex, fun series and movies, and cat cuddling. There was also a walk or two on the cemetery/top of the hill near our house, one of those included lots of snow!
Our Christmas was very nice, too. Besides Andrew, my best friend Eric and my crush A, we ended up having another guest, AD. She's from Mexico, she's one of our (Andrew and I) closest friends in the Psych department and is in the last year of her PhD. She'd recently broken up with her long-time boyfriend, who came to this country with her, and while they're on amicable terms and still roommates, they're obviously trying to start fresh without the other. I was delighted to have her over for our little Christmas get-together, I really like her.
It was five of us in the end, each from a different country, four from Latin America and one from Asia. The meal was excellent, the conversation afterwards too. Eric and AD got along very well, and they spoke mostly about sex. I would have loved to jump in, but I wasn't sure to what extent I would make Andrew uncomfortable or I'd embarrass him. I resented his presence because of this at the time, but I had the good sense to bring it up with him days later and ask him how he'd have felt, and he said he wouldn't have minded. That's a relief.
At some point during the conversation, A said he'd once had a bi girlfriend, and that he was possessive of her because she was an actress and she had no inhibitions around her colleagues and all that, and AD brought up the dreadful threesome comment. I was hoping Eric would say something about that (he's queer and a well-informed one at that) but he didn't. I know I should have been the one to speak, though. I should have, well, defended my sexuality, but I wasn't even out to A and AD, and I remained silent. More than silent, frozen. I kicked myself the next few days over that. I also discussed this with Andrew, during one of our walks. That was cool.
Besides that, though, it was a lovely Christmas' eve, and the next day I woke up feeling happy and warm all over because of it. After dessert and near midnight, the five of us opened presents. There were so many presents under the tree, from one to the other of us, but Andrew and I also threw the cats in the mix, to give and receive, so the multiplied. The gifts were nothing huge or fancy or expensive, but I think that for the five of us they meant being in nice company and they brought memories of being at home and with family.
For New Year's Eve, it will be the same group again, except for A who is traveling. We'll have a relaxed meal and just wait for 2018 to reach the island. That's good enough for me.
I don't tend to reflect on the year that's passed. It seems like a lot to back on, and I already reflect on shorter periods, thanks. No resolutions for me, either. But if there's one thing I hope to do in 2018 is to get my Simeon cartoons going somehow (such a concrete aim), and keep writing and get published. Then again, that's an ongoing goal, it's just that with a brand-new year it seems more attainable. It isn't. I did submit a couple of short stories to the uni's creative writing journal; and I'm still crossing my fingers that the novel I submitted will get some attention, even if it doesn't win. I'm afraid I'll just get my hopes crushed in both instances, but I had to try.