Tuesday, 01/25/05 - 12:07 pm.
Right now I'd be at the airport, leaving Houston. But a phone call changed everything, and so I'm just sitting still here, in Houston, waiting for the plumber to arrive and finish his damn job in the sink.
I didn't call Joseph this morning, as I said I would, because there was a little obstacle. My nephew couldn't find his violin and was late for school. He was ever so raging, rushing and moaning loudly. He missed the bus and the middle school isn't that near. He went walking, though if I were him I'd have taken the bike.
But you see, his violin was on the trunk of the van. The van that my sister in law drives everyday to work, but magically was in the garage today, because she decided to take the bus. Did you look in the trunk?, I asked the boy, fearing he'd chop my head off. Yes, I did, he replied, not quite chopping my head off.
No, he did not. I found the violin there, but it was too late, he'd gone by then. I knew it was there, I remembered. Last night we went to his concert, which by the way, frustrated him. Truth to be told, his quartet wasn't very in tune, but his solo was wonderful. I actually was paying more attention to taking pictures, and to the fact that there was gonna be some sort of dessert buffet afterwards (I had two slices of cheesecakse, I suck). He got mad at us, because we were telling him he did ok. You're family, that's what you're supposed to say!. First, it's my non-musically trained opinion. Second, then don't ask.
I don't know what kept me from rechecking the trunk...or checking it, I bet he only swept his sight on the surface of the car (these kids are like that, they'll say "I can't find it" when they haven't even looked). I feel like saying "I told you" and give him a little lecture when he comes home and finds the violin in his bedroom, where I've left it, but he's not so much of a listener. He'll blame his parents for not taking it out last night.
Speaking of last night, I think I hurt my niece's feelings. But I don't feel an ounce of regret, because I was just telling the truth. I was telling my sister in law how I'd be glad to help her with the science project report (and I have, I typed it in the computer), but it was a shame she could never do it on her own. I don't remember the words, but I was saying that you couldn't really count on her to make her own project. Which is true. I was supposed to help her, but she kept saying "tomorrow". And if she isn't pushed, she doesn't do a thing.
When my sister in law handed me the draft of the report, she made a gesture, meaning "she heard you". Moments later I heard some sobbing. Yeah, well, whatever. It's the truth, and had I known she was listening, I could've even articulated my thoughts a little more, to cover a wider variety of subjects relating to some of her attitudes.
It just upsets me, when we call her or ask her to do something and all she says is I'm coming or hold on. The second call gets as a reply: I'M COMING!!! or more often a I KNOW!!!!. Still, she never comes. You can try to remind her something she has to do, you'll always get the same resentment-loaded (why, anyway?) answer: I KNOW!
The only thing she said on the subject last night, though, was are you done with the report? I'll help you tomorrow after school. That was sweet, but all I can say is yeah, right. She'll start watching TV and playing GameBoy and playing online until it's dinner time and then until it's bedtime and someone tells her "you have yet to do your homework" and she'll yell "I KNOW!".
I think what upsets me about the weekday afternoons and evenings here is that they're quite predictable. And all I see, and comes true, is an endless chain of arguments and excuses that come from and sometimes between my nephew and my niece. What a drag.
Yesterday afternoon I went to the creek behind my niece's school, to throw rocks. I also went on the swings. It kept me amused, I admit it. I had a good time. Such simple things I cannot do at home. Also, my 8 year-old nephew got hit by a huge rock on his head. He was lifting it, and it broke in two. I was far away just watching him, I was going to tell him to put it down.
I was worried for the first minutes, until he finally started playing like nothing had happened, and his tears dried. I was feeling so guilty. You see, I'm looking after these children. They'd asked me to cross the creek and I'd said no. It was just a few inches deep, but still...I think I watched too much Rescue 911 in my childhood, and with children, everything is potential danger (with grown-ups, is potential blooper). I don't think of this often, but I'm actually in charge. And I was doing fine, until I let him lift the rock. Luckily, now the incident is just a memory and a little bump in his head.
Well, I'll go practice guitar for a while. I'm learning don't let me down, which is funny, because Joe brought that song up in his last e-mail. By what he says, I'm assuming he's still feeling pathetic. You know what? He should either tell me what's wrong or not even let me know he's feeling bad. I'm not nosy or anything, I just hate half-confessions.
All in all, it feels good to think I could not be here right now, but I am. How philosophical of me.
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