Monday, 02/21/05 - 8:53 pm.
I drove today, and it came out pretty natural (having in mind it's ME), except for the little fuck-up at the end. But I've found myself a bit more confident on this thing. I went to pick up my dad, with my mom and my cousin (he started university today, and he'll come over for lunch everyday). Because of the little fuck-up at the end, my dad didn't say anything good about my driving. He's like that. I needed some encouraging words, like, "yeah, you did better", or something. Which goes to show, you mustn't rely on people.
I've been thinking about the Steven and Teresa Tyler news, about their separation. I think that's what "they'll be in my thoughts" mean. While I want to tell the world that I really care about Steven Tyler and his family, that I've admired Teresa for putting up with his massive rock 'n' roll persona, and that I hope everything works out (whether they solve their differences or go their own ways), I truly believe it's none of my bussiness.
Speaking of Aerosmith, on a much less private matter, I finally got to see my You Gotta Move DVD. All those crowd shots were chicken soup for my lesbian soul, but I got tired of them after a while. And have a mind, I am not a lesbian. But it was alright. I wasn't THAT excited because seeing Aerosmith on TV barely does anything for me anymore. Instead of getting all pumped up, I get sad. I want to be there, in front of them, live. And so I believe I should start saving. You can do wonders with money, can't you?
Joe and I are through...*cough* not that we were ever together, but with last night's conversation I came to the conclusion that he's kind of sick of me, or at least we ran out of things to say. That's what I want to believe anyway, so I won't be that sad over our lack of communication, after a couple of months of daily e-mails and five hours of chatting per night.
Last night I was really, really down about this. Because you know, he was this beautiful fantasy, the cute boy, the guitar player on stage, that you fall in love with at first sight. But as I always maintained, at the back of my head, perhaps in reality we wouldn't go beyond talking about our favorite musicians, and it just so happens that our only common point on that is The Beatles. Perhaps we'd talk a little about books and movies the other hasn't read and see, but that's about it.
Fortunately, I am in love with Joseph. And contrary to popular belief, I am not going to leave him now that Steven Tyler is, in appearance, single. For the record, when it comes to Aerosmith, I've always wanted to be a roadie, not a groupie. Roadies are closer to the band, on the long run. So ha.
I may be deaf by the end of the week, if I continue with the cranking up as I did today. I've had music on most of the day. Partly because we have these workers, the ones working on the bathrooms, and I figured I'd quietly introduce them to The Beatles and Aerosmith (although quietly may not be the word). Then it's just me, being dumb. Sometimes I go crazy and I like my music very loud, just as I like my Aerosmith without subtitles (I think the DVD doesn't even have that option, anyway).