I have to keep distance until he feels better and can break up with me properly.
Thursday, 03/31/05 - 11:43 pm.

There's a small picture of Joseph in the newspaper today. It's just some sort of collage in the middle page, of pictures of this party at the beach during Holy Week (or Easter Week, vacation, anyway). It's not big deal, really. I just thought I'd mention it.

Actually, a girl, Marcela, a classmate of mine (and workmate on the Psychology Billboard thing) mentioned it, while talking about something else. (...) the one who's your boyfriend, or was your boyfriend (...). Also, when I was walking up the stairs to my last class (the last classroom on the last story of building A) I ran into this guy, Will, a mutual friend of Joseph and I. He asked me how it was going, and I said, I don't know. He said the same, he doesn't know. I said something about how I've been wanting to talk to him to work things out. Stick to studying, he said, half-joking.

All my day at the campus was me hanging about building A. I'd go back and forth to building B and to the pedestrian's gate, hoping to see Joseph, yet knowing he wouldn't be showing up. I must admit I was also hoping to find Joe, because you know, he brightens my day. But none showed up, and my last minutes before class were spent talking about tomorrow's Psychology Billboard first formal meeting (my brother, the coordinator of the career will be there), and all the drama that went on the Psychology Students Association, that was created and died last year. I had a blast hearing all the gossip. I'm glad I had the guts to tell Marcela that I'll pass on being part of the PSA.

Ok, I haven't cried these past two days, which I consider an accomplishment. You know what? I even feel like I've assimilated the fact that Joseph is going to break up with me. I feel like sending him a message "I promise I won't make a drama, and what I have to say won't suck more than five minutes of your time. Please, if you want to break up, don't keep putting it off, it's killing me". Something along those lines. I haven't done it because I'm thinking of the death of his friend. I should just leave him alone. *sigh*

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