Monday, 07/08/05 - 8:18 pm.
My nephew and niece went back to Houston this morning, and that probably made me sicker than I already was. Since saturday, I haven't slept properly, because I have a very annoying, endless thirst and I can't breathe.
My nephew and niece were very, very moody when they woke up to get ready to leave. But on the way to the airport they got all cuddly again, and I was trying to deny the fact that they were leaving. But they did.
I was very upset, though, because my dad left them, and made my mom and I left them earlier than supposed, because he had his radio show at 8 am. He's always said that family comes first, and I was pissed off because he was putting his goddamn show first. His radio show, coincidentally, revolves around family topics. He'd already found people to cover for him, he'd arranged everything beforehand, and yet he was in a very stupid and exaggerated rush because he wanted to be there on time. I hated him for that.
The kids were traveling with their other grandmother, so we didn't exactly leave them alone. They stayed having breakfast with her and their grandparent. But we could've stayed longer with them before they boarded the plane, and we didn't. My dad is fucking psycho sometimes.
So I was dropped off at the house and my mom and dad went to their radio show. My mom, on the other hand, is not psycho, but she's submissive (as I fear I am, too), so she swallows everything and tags along.
I tried to get some sleep, but the thirst and the stuffed nose were killing me. I got desperate, and my mom found me crying. She told me to calm down, and gave me a warm cloth.
Slowly, I changed my reasons to cry, from not getting any proper sleep this past three days, to the absense of my nephew and niece. I cried harder, and I didn't want to think about it.
To get distracted, I popped down with love in my TV-VCR (the one that used to be my niece's). It was ok, I liked it a lot, except that the story seemed too forced in the end.
In the evening, I found Bowling for Columbine on TV. It made me bitter. It happens.
Right now, I'm chatting with my niece. Hopefully I'll talk to Joseph later. You know, yesterday when I introduced them to each other, it was like...no, it WAS two worlds coming together. Like, the best of my life. Everything happened so fast that I just remember her face when he shook her hand, she seemed fascinated.
At night, Joseph said she was going to be gorgeous when she grew up. I told my niece so, and she put her hands on her cheeks, a little embarrassed. It's 'cause he thinks you are pretty, and he finds us alike. This morning, she told me to say goodbye to him for her. They could get along very well.
I shall be going to bed early tonight. I seriously need need to get back on track with swimming (I haven't gone in two weeks). I hope I can sleep.
But this is a drag. Going back to normal, I mean. The semester starts next week, and I've discovered I am tired of my job (the child abuse project). Plus, now I have no one to go for coffee with...legally, I mean (I could go with Joseph, but that requires making up excuses). I'm quite sad at the moment.
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