Saturday, 8/17/02 - 9:30 pm.
Veronica was here this afternoon, to study math with me. It was so damn weird, it was like we were wearing uniforms. We both had a blue (the same blue) shirt and jeans and white socks and sandals. It was funny.
I wound up listening to her problems, and she does have many. I feel sorry for her. I didn't even know what to tell her. Her boyfriend, her family...herself. A lot of people blame a lot of things on her personality, and she does accept it's true. It is, I know that, because I've been through a lot of hard times because of her. But I can't rub it in her face. I just can't. I don't want to. I love her, and I hate seeing her suffer.
I won't write down all of her problems, but I can say I've gone through one or two things off her list. It's terrible listening to her problems, because you feel unable to help her. I just listened to her. I thought she was going to cry. I see her cry often at school.
Well, on the other hand, we had a somewhat good time. As good as it can be when you're frustrated with math.
...I wanted to ask you something...I don't know, maybe I'm being indescreet but...well, everybody's wondering...you know what I'm talking about, right?...why, of course. I said I don't know, you'll read it in the newspapers tomorrow. I actually didn't know her real question (notice she didn't ask) and of course she was confused with my answer. If he asked you...would you say yes?. I had to say yes. I can't deny I love him. You guys are so obvious...and look so cute together!!! I'm getting excited for you guys!!!. Um...yay. I guess.
She told me that she once saw him crying. I felt terrible. It seems Veronica is always involved in everybody's suffering side of their emotional life. She's always aware of everybody's suffering. And at a certain point, I kind of wish I had that ability. It seems I live a happier life.
I was reading my first month of entries and...my life is now completely different. But still, when I listen to Veronica talking about her problems....I feel...underrated? Yeah, that's the word.
Hi. Sometimes I feel underrated.
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And now, another chapter of your soap opera...., uh, forget it.
Last night.
Him: today I was asked a very indiscreet question.
Me: what was it?
Him: No, that can not be told.
Me: you and truth-or-dare with Norman...
Him: No, it wasn't Norman. It was Ricardo.
Me: He was hitting on you again or something?
Him: No, it was related to...two beautiful people.
*staring at the blank conversation window for a while*
Me: So.....you can not tell?
Him: Yes, but I'd be embarrased.
Me: You? Embarrased? You had no underwear on today!
Long story short, he said he could tell me but I'd be embarrased, too.
Tonight.
We're having an awkward silence online. I don't know if it's because of what we just said or it's just any external factor...
Me: So what was that question Ricardo asked?
Him: he asked me if we were boyfriend and girlfriend...
Me: Veronica asked me something similar today....
Both of us: Woah.
Him: what did you tell her?
Me: that she'd read it in the news tomorrow....mass media.
*blah, blah, blah about comunism and massive suicides*
Him: Imagine if they applied the 9 feet rule on us... (like Art and Cel, not allowed to be less than 9 feet away from each other)
*blah, blah, blah*
Me: And what did you answer to Ricardo?
Him: I said no, just...
*minutes of silence*
Me: Just....?
Him: Nothing. That last particle was not needed.
Then we had the awkard silence.
We're back on the conversation, talking about whatever else that doesn't have to do with us as a couple, like PC drivers and chocolate milk.
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