Rainy & random.
Friday, 09/20/02 - 4:00 pm.

I took the math test today, and I think...I hope I'll get 6, which is the minimun grade you need to be able to say "hi, I didn't flop".

Cel left school after the test, because she was going to the National University to get an application form. It's hard to believe we all are going to college in just a few months. I am not ready, and I can tell (and I've been told) no one else is. Two years of high school it's just not enough.

I was happy today. I haven't been in such a good mood since Denver broke up (so to speak) with me. No, I mean...his leaving didn't put me in a good mood, I'm saying I was in a good mood when we were together...you get the point.

Part of my good mood was because of the rain. This year has practically only rained at night. But today, it rained in the morning. Then the sun came out. Then it rained again. And there were gaps in the gray clouds, blue gaps. Just beautiful. It's kind of pathetic how people can't stop to stare at the sky once in a while. They'll only look at it when it falls on their heads and crushes their miserable existence.


Simeon: that was very uncalled for, who's that directed to, anyway?

I hate mankind, Simeon.

I was happy enough not to care about Denver today. I know I'd have been brokenhearted today, when I noticed he was approaching to me, when I realized he was going to talk to me, when I felt his hand on my arm, when he asked if I'd seen Norman and when, I having said "noIdon't", silently turned his back to me and walked away like I was a wall.

I didn't care then, now I do. I have slow reactions sometimes. It's like a way to defend myself. I pretend not to care, and I'm doing good at not caring, but eventually, if I think about it too much, I'm crushed by its own weight.

He still tears me apart sometimes.

There was a confussion this morning, because my classmates and I (room D, 27 people) were supposed to watch a movie on social studies. The bell rang for the class, and the teacher never showed up. After 15 minutes of waiting, Yaha said we should head over to the Video room. We walked through the hallways and when we got there, we found out it was already occupied by other kids. We walked back to the classroom and we ran into the teacher, who said we should go to the Video room. We told her it was occupied but we followed her. We walked again through the hallways, behind her. She saw what we saw and so she returned to the library (where she was coming from when we ran into her), to talk to the lady in charge of booking rooms, and we followed her. Then she went to the video room again, and we followed her. It was a 27 people livestock walking through 3 hallways, wandering aimlessly for about 10 minutes.

In the end, we got to see the movie, and it was boring.

I'd forgotten to mention that what came up was that Cel and Art had a big fight. It's funny how things works sometimes. I opened the Yahoo! Messenger, and I usually log in as invisible. I checked my offline messages and then I completely forgot to close the program. Suddenly, it popped on my screen a message from Cel, that scared the shit out of me (not because of the message, the sound and the new window took me by surprise):
I need to talk to you...maybe tomorrow, then?
I quickly replied, telling her I was online, and asking her to tell me what was wrong. And she described the terrible argument they had in public, in front of strangers. They were on the bus, and they were yelling. Long story short, she said he called her later on, saying there was one thing he never regrets, and that's dating her.

When I was talking to her, a lot of things came to my mind. I was afraid it'd be like when Veronica and Carmen broke up, and I'd have to choose. I was afraid I'd have to get used not to see them together anymore, not to have them over anymore. I was scared they'd break up.

They didn't. They had a long talk at night and now it's like nothing happened. Hi, I'm glad.

Yesterday I gave Geovanni a band-aid and a mysterious flavor candy. I love to carry weird stuff in my pocket and here's what I was carrying yesterday:
- two dollars.
- the mysterious flavor candy.
- Obi Wan Kenobi, lego version (you know, if you remove his hair and put it backwards, it can be Chewbacca)
- An earring.
- A piece of glass in case I wanted to cut myself.
- A band-aid in case I got to cut myself.
- A penny.
- Two ribbons.

It's all so...random, Cel said. I gave the candy and the band-aid to Geovanni, just because. I like him. I think his personality is a slightly modified personality of Robin Williams.

Wait, I lost the point to all this.

I'll go take a nap.

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