Sunday, 03.18.2012 - 8:01 pm.
Andrew and I celebrate our first anniversary today! I'm so happy, he makes me so happy! I feel incredibly blessed/lucky to have him. A bit more than a year ago, he was literally waiting for me to arrive into his life, and I had to go out to the world to find him.
It's been a great weekend of celebration; he's cooked a few nice meals, let's start with that. We spent the whole day home yesterday, but in the evening we dressed up and went for sushi. Afterwards we went to a bar where a good friend of ours, Daniel, was celebrating his birthday. He and Javier, one of Andrew's best friends, live in Santiago and they are roommates. But most of their friends are here so they came for the weekend to celebrate. Andrew and I stayed until 2:30 am, and since I'd had coffee at the sushi place, I didn't get sleepy at all (my main problem when I go out to party). Plus, Daniel and Javier are one of my favorite people to hang out with, so I simply didn't want to leave.
There were other friends there, and they made a toast for our anniversary. Everybody is so happy for Andrew and I've been accepted unconditionally in all of his social circles. And not just because I'm his girlfriend, by now I think most of his friends have had the chance to know I'm pretty nice and smart and even very good-looking, as I was told this afternoon.
This afternoon, by the way, Andrew took me to the hospital to meet one of his old-time friends. He had an accident years ago and suffered severe brain damage. He's very lucid, cognitively intact, but he can't talk, walk, make facial expressions or even swallow. He lives in the hospital and has been in therapy for years, and communicates through a hand-made keyboard, like a Ouija. He's made a lot of progress and he's bound to improve more, I was told, but there's still a long, long way to go, years from now.
It is until now that I start hearing the impressions everyone around Andrew had when he informed them I was living with him. He had this grand resolution of moving out of his grandparents' house (he was raised by them more than by his parents) and was bragging about finally living alone and doing whatever he pleased. But just a few weeks later, along comes a foreign girl and he tells everyone how he's just having her over for a while, until she finds a place to live.
Goes like this:
- Middle of February: "yes, I'm living alone now, you're welcome to stay in my apartament, I have a spare bedroom".
- Beggining of March: "you're welcome to stay but you'll have to sleep on the couch, there's a girl, a foreign classmate of mine, staying in the spare bedroom".
- End of March: "She's still here. But you're welcome to stay in the spare bedroom".
I've always felt a bit guilty about "robbing" him of his chance of living alone, but he's made very clear that he offered me a place to stay because he wanted to (and had the hots for me) and not because he felt he had to. I too wonder if I should've lived alone myself, but the truth is, living together hasn't taken away each other's freedom, and I too live with him because I want to.
Of course I notice the similarity of this my story with the story of how Joseph's wife moved in with him. Except I was lucky Andrew wasn't seeing anyone and neither was I; both Joseph and his wife ended long-term relationships abruptly to be together...perhaps you pretty much don't choose that kind of situations (although there may be better ways to handle them other than Joseph's way) but still, I'm really glad my happiness with Andrew didn't require us crushing a third party's heart.
I'm happy, and thankful for Andrew. Last night I was asking him about potential deal-breakers for both of us, and while the future is always uncertain and we are bound to have tensions and conflicts, looks like we are a match and on the same page on the things that matter for a life together. I love Andrew with all my heart, and there's the plus that I feel safe with him. In the sense that I know I can trust him to be my hard-working partner and that he's got my back. I didn't feel that sense of security with the other guy, and yeah, with reason!
On other news, my little surgical procedure went well, last friday. I got the mole removed in a matter of 20 minutes -to 80's music, including AEROSMITH!- and the doctor said it turned out to be superficial. Now I'm just waiting for the biopsy results. Andrew came with me, I appreciated his presence and support so much. I have a few stitches and it hurts and it itches, but hopefully I'll make it to the 21-day-mark without a trip to the ER to get re-stitched.
Also, I'm taking a class in english, on culture and psychopatholgy (yum!), by an australian professor. I'll start to write my thesis results this week. I begin volunteering with the clown doctors again next month. And the book I'm writing is surprisingly coming along (I need to write about that, but one of these days).
Lately, I've missed my family and friends a lot. One of these days I remembered the simple moment of walking through the dining room and seeing my mom reading the newspaper and eating fruit. I realized that image will probably never again be part of my routine and that broke my heart. At least I get to see my parents every weekend via Skype, and write to my siblings and friends regularly; thanks. technology. Being away from the people I love is the thing that sucks the most about living abroad.
But, that aside: I love my life. And I hope to have Andrew with me for the rest of it.
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