Monday, 10.10.2013 - 8:30 pm.
I ended may attending a TEDx event, organized by a team that included Andrew. I was excited when I got the invitation thanks to him and it was a wonderful learning experience, although it took me an hour under the rain to get to the place. I arrived soaking wet.
Last week I was anxious. I found myself hating one of my jobs and the pressure was such that I wasn't making progress on the other two jobs, nor enjoying them, nor enjoying anything for that matter. I tried to stick around, telling myself everyone has to do something they hate at some point to make a living. I endured days of making phone calls, one after another, to schools and getting lost to visit a couple. Chasing people, pretty much. And I'd have to do that for years. Not every day, but still. Making phone calls and scheduling and re-scheduling and trying to fit a lot of people's agendas into a single one.
I was in the shower on thursday morning and I said, "I can't do this anymore". I quit hours later. Andrew had been very supportive since he noticed I was unhappy. He was the one who'd told me to quit a week before. When I heard that idea, I backed off: "no...you know, it's not that bad". It was. For me it was. It's not in my character to do what I had to do in that project. I can't really explain it or justify it. Andrew knows me so it was clear for him that I should quit. It was clear to me, too, but I wanted to make an effort. I did. But I felt unmotivated and annoyed.
It was a luxury, quitting. But I hated it so much and I could get along without the money it paid. A few days later I learned there's a high probability that I'll get a part-time at the research project I do like. So there's that.
After I made it official, I felt so relieved. And today I handed over the progress I'd made to the new supervisor that took my place. It is a wonderful project and the team was great, made up of people I knew from from my master's time, and thus I consider friends. But I couldn't stay just for the people, and anyway, we all worked independently from one another, we just needed to coordinate to reach the goal of students needed.
So free from that burden, I was able to enjoy this past weekend. Andrew and I went out of town with a friend and his girlfriend. We went in their car and stopped on the road for breakfast. We bathed in springs. We had a delicious, traditional chilean supper. We went for a drinks at a casino (never been to a casino before, but I know enough behaviorism principles to stay away from gambling and the like). And we spent the night in a cabin. The next day, Andrew and I took a bus back home so we could be on time to have lunch with his grandfather.
Speaking of Andrew, his birthday is on saturday. This makes me happy, I suppose it is so because he makes me happy. But it's hard to get him a gift because what he likes he gets inmediately. So considering he's very refined with his hot beverages and his meals, I've bought him a special mug and I'll take him to a nice restaurant that normally we wouldn't go to because we deem it too luxurious for us.