Saturday, Sept. 26, 2020 - 12:00 pm.
After a few uneventful weeks, I can say that things are happening again:
1. We got a call from the adoption office.
We've been summoned to attend three workshops in October. I did not expect that they'd call us in the foreseeable future. These workshops have to be onsite and the virus continues to be very much around.
I'm not giving these workshops much thought because that's still one tiny step that doesn't even qualify us yet; qualification happens when a psychologist and a social worker come visit us. But it's neat, and it makes me excited and terrified about the future. I'm sorry, I want a kid to read them a book.
2. The above news sort of broke my girlfriend's heart, however, because we've talked about taking a break from the relationship when my child arrives.
At this point, though, I'm positive that I don't want a break, let alone break up. I said that at some point because I'll probably be too busy with the kid to be there for her.
We talked about this, and since it's still way into the future and we don't know what that'll look like, it's no use worrying now. We'll figure it out as we go. She said she was scared to lose me, and I assured her she can't lose me. There's no way she can lose me.
3. I think my book is done.
This week I messaged back and forth with someone from the publishing house, fixing errors in the manuscript here and there, and changing the synopsis. I was mortally embarrassed but I managed to ask Andrew and my girlfriend (separately) for feedback on the latter. They had very helpful suggesstions.
So I've approved the manuscript and the cover. I'm guessing I'll get one more PDF with the whole thing in its final form and then it goes to print. And I guess I have to start getting over myself and start owning this thing I did.
4. I was invited to speak at a conference of Central American writers, put together by a university in Guatemala in November.
I said yes. My writing usually goes by ignored or is so insignificant (quite possibly because it's of no interest to other people, and I can't do much about that) that I'm always amazed when someone shows any interest in my work.
I replied to the invitation with a resounding yes. First, because I was very flattered and most importantly, because I need the exposure now that the book is coming out (ish).
5. My editor at the online newspaper invited me as a speaker for a workshop she runs for journalists, funded by an international women's organization.
This session is in October and is about LGBTI issues. I think I'm supposed to talk about this from an academic standpoint, but I haven't received the info yet.
It is a PAID gig. I'm speechless. Nobody ever pays me for anything, except for the university that pays me for my job, and I assure you they do it reluctantly (not my boss, though, I know she'd pay me more if it was in her hands).
6. Our two closest friends in Sheffield, one of them my friend Eric, submitted their thesis this week. Andrew and I cried tears of joy and pride for them. It sucks that we can't be physically with them, the way they were with us over a year ago, but we still celebrated with them.
7. Lastly, last night I had the pleasure of seeing my husband come out to one of his closest friends since their undergrad years.
Andrew's so much better at coming out than I am, setting himself up and just saying those three words in a heartbeat.
We were at this friend's new apartment, she invited us for the first time, as she recently moved in. She's had a few rough years, coming back from her dream city after getting her PhD, just like us, hardly fitting in back home and with a divorce from a cheating, callous husband to boot. But she's finally finding her place, and while the three of us endure some injustices that have us in precarious work conditions, we've been of the lucky ones during the pandemic.
Back to Andrew: I feel so proud of him, and I feel so lucky that we found each other. Now I look at him and I think to myself "I knew it, I fucking knew it!". Or maybe I didn't, but I did keep saying he was too good to be straight. He's been coming out to a few friends lately, and while we don't talk a lot about his situation, he said he's working through some shame. Fucking society, man. But all the friends he's told love him dearly and, as far as I know, he's gotten more love and support from them. I get the feeling he's a bit happier now.