Saturday, Oct. 24, 2020 - 5:05 pm.
The adoption workshop is over. My book is out. I feel happy and accomplished, but this isn't the end of anything major, and if it is, it's very anti-climatic.
I knew the adoption workshop would be something to endure, and Andrew and I did, beautifully. Thankfully we were spared from doing role-playing had those workshops been conducted face-to-face, as they're meant to be. But of course we couldn't go through these sessions without one activity of "close your eyes and imagine...". Could've been worse, though, it was indeed just one.
This last sessions we reviewed our responses to scenarios in which the child is having a crisis. This isn't exclusive to adoptive families, it's general parenting, so it's funny how just a few people who end up being parents are questioned about these things. I'm not sore about that, I can't think of when you'd put people through these questions. it's just an observation and I'm glad I have the chance to prepare.
One of the featured (anonymized) responses was mine, which meant it was up for debate. Frankly, I think it's stupid that you take your child for ice cream after she's pushed another kid to the ground and taken his toy, but a lot of people went for that as a "distraction strategy" and apparently that was ok. The response was very adult-centric, they said, not taking in consideration the child's needs. The hell it was, and in my insides I said "don't tell me how to raise my kid".
That's not to say I didn't get ideas on how to be a more sensible parent, but thankfully those workshops are over. Afterwards, Andrew and I submitted some documents for the next stage, which is the in-depth interview by the psychologist and the social worker.
The interview won't happen until January, at least. By then we'll be in this process for a year without having been assessed whether we're suitable for adopting a kid. A part of me is energically complaining, but also, it's understandable, particularly during a pandemic, and also maybe, I'm not that much in a hurry.
Now, the book. My copies should arrive within the next 48 hours, but considering tomorrow people in this country are voting for a new constitution and there will be chaos, they may arrive a few days later. Until then, it still feels like it doesn't exist out there.
Yet it does, it came out four days ago.
I got a lot of support from friends and family. I'm grateful and humbled, but I'm not sure if that translates into sales and reviews. Unfortunately publishing a book is a business, so I'm concerned with reaching out to people who don't know me, and that's where I crash and burn. I'm not a business person. Hence, I don't know how the book is doing, and I'm afraid to find out.
Andrew's reading it. It's a bit embarrassing for me, but he's genuinely interested and he's genuinely enjoying it. He's made comments that make me feel like he gets what I'm talking about, but I can only give a short answer to avoid ruining the personal image he's built of the story in his head. I appreciate his support, his being fiercely proud of me. He rushed to buy the e-book when we woke up on the 20th and posted a photo of the (digital) cover on his social media to let everyone know it was out. He's quite a guy.
Speaking of him, he got two wisdom teeth removed yesterday so I'm on nurse duty. Sort of. He prefers to look after himself whenever he can (like every adult should, yes, but still), and I don't think I'm half the stellar caretaker that he is to me when I'm ill. But I've managed to get him to chill the fuck out and let me do stuff for him.
Anyway, the book. I think I'll cry when my copies arrive and I see it in print, then it'll be real. I'm counting on the publisher to do some marketing, which I know they do...so maybe what I mean is that I'm counting on people to become interested in the book.
On a sad front: my mom's cousin passed away. For her, this is the third family member that's passed away during the pandemic. One was my cousin -her sister's son- due to the virus; two weeks ago, it was a family matriarch living in Canada, not sure if due to the virus; and a few days ago, her close cousin in her home town, she had a chronic illness, but I don't know if she contracted the virus and made it worse. My poor mom. It stresses me out thinking that my dad is barely of any use as support for her. I can't even picture him holding her to comfort her.
These have been the highlights of my week. It was supposed to be a week off, but I had to work on Monday and Tuesday, and also, unexpectedly, on Wednesday: I'll be a speaker at an event next Saturday, more on that next week. There were several things demanding my attention here and there, so no, I can't say I fully relaxed, nor I did what I wanted (silly stuff like getting back to my comic). But it was indeed better than not having a week off.
All in all, things are going well for us. We're grateful for this every day and we don't take it for granted. I hope you're well, too. Stay safe.
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