Finishing treatments and buying plane tickets on a whim
Sunday, Oct. 09, 2022 - 5:40 pm.

I've finished therapy. I've finished jaw therapy, as well. I wouldn't say either thing radically changed my life (my jaw remains broken, it's unfixable), but they did help me gain more control over my body. I have a deeper understanding of its inner workings, I listen to it more. I listen to myself more. And with this, I do think I have achieved a slightly higher quality of life.

Therapy ended quietly. I think both my therapist and I knew it had to happen for a while. We were just kind of stretching it to "wait" for Andrew, for whom therapy has no end in sight yet. But in my last session this past Monday, there came to a poing where I ended a story and said "I don't really have anything else to tell you".

I always had things to tell her, but less and less it was something that required an hour-long discussion. It was mostly musings, anecdotes. I'd worked through some issues myself before therapy, and she helped me with the rest. Not to downplay it, though. Therapy was a wonderful experience, and my therapist was a true ally.

Did therapy prepare me more to adopt a child, though? No. My therapist and I agreed that I was as ready as I could be, given the yet unexistent nature of my child. She's working on her report to the adoption agency now. But we're not rushing Andrew's process. Everybody has their own pace with these things.

Regarding the professor I mentioned in my last entry: It turns out she wasn't rushed to the capital by ambulance. That was a piece of information that mutated more and more until it reached our ears. That's not good, but we learned the chain of sources and there was no ill intention in the transmission of this info. So anyway, she is actually in the capital right now, starting chemo. Things are as good as they can be, I guess.

Perhaps the biggest news I have right now is that I'm going home, to my home country I mean, for Christmas. I decided it on a whim a couple of days ago. I think this could be (at least) one of my parents' last Christimas, though to be fair, I've been fearing that since 2011 when I moved to this country and my mom got cancer. Nevertheless, that possibility is true, given the deteriorated health of both.

It's always a mess, trying to figure out where and how I'm gonna spend the holidays. There's budget constraints, there's my work schedule, there's siblings or nephews/nieces who can't make it on specific dates.

Most of all, though, I hate spending the holidays away from Andrew. Especially because his brother passed away on December 23rd, I don't like leaving him alone on that day. But he says I choose him every day of the year so it won't be bad if I choose my parents and siblings for the holidays. He'll be just fine, he says. And he will be. I think both he and I enjoy being on our own here and there.

So I have the dates ready and I just have to buy the plane tickets, which I'll probably do today.

Be well, stay safe.

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