Friday, 01/17/03 - 2:22 pm.
I almost lost my mind, when Cel told me that he looked sad. Sad, melancholy...I almost feel sorry for him.
But then she said it's not that bad. Hey, don't think he's on the verge of breaking down or something...he just looks...different. Like more mature. He doesn't bite anymore.
*Simeon points at the clock*
Right, yeah. I should be on my way to
school the UCA (sorry, it's the habit). But no, I am not (gee, can't you tell?). Classes will start later tha usual. And since free time doesn't really come for free, classes will end later than usual.
I have a test today, by the way. About things I really don't care for. About things that, oddly enough, I know by heart. I didn't even know I knew them. But I turns out I do.
I haven't made new friends. I know some people's names, but that doesn't make us friends. I think they don't even know my name. And that's ok, I don't care. I'm not a social being.
Victor and I spend the recess together. Irene is busy with extra stuff (like forming volleyball teams -she's a natural leader, I tell you-). Ern goes his own way, to smoke with a friend of his and Victoria...she's found herself two girls she gets along really well with. I suppose Victor and I have the same social disease.
He's a nice kid, he even waits after class. It's nice, because usually he walks out of the classroom before I do. And when I walk out, he's out of the classroom or by the stairs, waiting for me, and sometimes he even waits with me for my dad to pick me up. It just feels nice.
I knew something like this would happen. I knew I could count on him to make my social-less college life less miserable.
His is not that miserable, I guess. At least he's always late for class, on purpose. I'm such a geek, I 'd never dare to be one minute late.
I even feel guilty for being at home right now. I'm nervous, part of me is yelling at me, telling me I'm wrong, I should be in class, it was the normal schedule, I'll miss everything, I just fucked everything up.
Please, make it shut the fuck up.
I talked to my friend Head this morning. We were discussing the fact that we both are 17 right now, and next year we'll be 19.
*Simeon makes a comment about the gaps in time*
Yay Ninja Turtles! *hearts all around*
I'm thinking of giving up Pink's concert. It's not like I'm a big fan of hers. I ramble on, until I get to a point where I say: No way, I have to be there. Alan is coming back next thursday (finally!), maybe he'll take me. I really don't even dare to ask my parents for permission, let alone tell me I will go. And I really don't want to go with my friends, either.
For me, I have to go to a concert with just one person. I don't know why, it's just my parameter, I suck. Maybe because yqtgwrkhcbhsgahsekj....I'm tired of typing, I'll go pack my shit and read before the exam.
It's weird, but I don't feel like myself today.
(Oh, Lord...my voices are performing The White Stripes' we're gonna be friends...honestly...is it normal to hear voices singing the song that's stuck in your head?)