Saturday, Oct. 14, 2023 - 10:56 am.
It's been two weeks in which I've been away from my desk at work, and I have to catch up here too.
I spent most of the first week of October in the southernmost city of the continent. I was there ten years ago for the same reason, attending a conference, and I felt the same way this time: I'd love to live here. It's so freaking cold and windy, but it's just such a vastly beautiful place...notwithstanding the military bases and the pervasive angry right-wing ideology, but what else is new in Latin America, and elsewhere.
We were staying right on the side of the cathedral, in front of the city square. A couple of blocks away we had the Magellan strait and a view to Tierra del Fuego. Some days you can also see the island where political prisoners were taken to be tortured during the dictatorship. Oh, no, there's no scaping brutality in this wonderful place, and wait until I tell you about the genocide of the people who lived there before all that was "discovered" by White people (I mean, fuck the name "Magellan strait" but we're stuck with it). There are no words for the cruelty, but we're all very aware by now how easy it is to justify wiping out entire populations that inconveniently live on the land that some other people want.
All that aside, the conference was great. Very well organized, and I'm not saying it just because the organizers were colleagues and friends of Andrew's. It's a small department and they pulled through, just a handful of people managing the works and agendas of hundreds of colleagues coming from afar. As a bonus, you could also see the Magellan strait and untouched lands with bunnies and birds (and flamingos?!) frolicking about from the building where the conference was taking place.
My presentation was OK. My keynote speech was OK. I also felt very comfortable during my interview for the host university TV channel, although I think by the end of it I stopped choosing my words carefully and I hope that shit remains unseen. I didn't say anything wrong, but it's gender, sexuality and sex ed we were talking about, and every statement can be turned into a sound bite to stir shit, if found by the wrong people.
Also, I had to come out on TV. The interviewer was good (I think, it's the first time I've been interviewed like that), but she asked me about the challenges of studying LGBTQ+ issues as a heterosexual researcher. She assumed I was straight. I replied I wasn't heterosexual and carried on with the reply from that standpoint. I should've specified that I was bisexual, but it turns out I have trouble saying it on TV.
On the day of our flight back home, Andrew and I went down to the beach to collect sand for two tiny souvenir bottles (one for me, one for my mom), and go for one last walk. We were joined by two stray dogs as soon as we left the hotel. Most stray dogs, like almost any dog, are just affection machines, four-legged angels that loyally stick to your heels as you walk down the streets, hoping to find some food, love, and a home. It's heartbreaking.
One of these dogs walked between Andrew and I. He had short fur and it was a springtime 5°C, so I guess he wanted some warmth. But the dogs walked with us, waited for us when Andrew went into a souvenir store. They'd walk away driven by some smell or another dog, and then run back to us. We gave them what we could, and what they'd given us: a little company, a bit of love. We even bought them some sandwiches in another souvenir store under our hotel to make their day easier.
Then we had to part ways. We walked into our hotel and the short fur dog stayed outside the glass door, sitting down with one of the most heartbreaking stares I've ever received. I love dogs. I can't have one because we live (and will continue to live) in an apartment. I have a separate heart for dogs and non-human animals in general (all humans are animals, you disgraceful PM). It's a double-edged sword engaging with stray dogs because it inevitably ends in pain, for the dog and for me. But these dogs were following us anyway. Might as well make it worthwhile.
A few days prior, our first day walking on the strait beach, I'd told Andrew that was the dream, or at least a dream of mine: living in a place like this and being able to leisurely walking on a cold beach with your dog. I had that fantasy for a few minutes when I squatted on the beach to get that Patagonian sand, as "our" dogs played with another one nearby. I got very attached to the short fur one, and it was mutual.
Then I had to leave them behind, outside in the cold, and I cried when we went into our hotel room. Tears and all. I can't understand how people think it's OK to throw dogs (and cats) onto the streets. Then again, people think it's OK to throw people onto the streets and do a lot of shitty things to others.
Not really the note I wanted to end on the recap of my trip, but such it is. It was a great trip, really; we didn't take any tours but that's alright. Andrew and I stayed in a lovely hotel, had great meals with friends, presented our work to others, supported one another and had fun... We had an amazing time.
***
We came back from that trip and into a week-long break from uni. Much needed, much appreciated. We still had to work, because it's a break just for us but the rest of the world keeps moving, but we were on vacation mode and got to relax.
I didn't do much of what I thought I'd do this week: get my teeth, skin, bones and vagina checked (nothing serious, just facing the aging process or requiring a check-up). But I did get a healing shot in my broken jaw. Yesterday. It was several shots, actually, first to numb both sides of my face, and then to strenghten the joints. It was very painful and it left me feeling beat up for the rest of the day.
But the doctor says the treatment is working! Getting my jaw checked is one of the best decisions I've ever made. It was mostly a fluke though, my doctor works in my uni and until I saw her line of work thanks to a uni science fair, it hadn't ocurred to me that something could be done about it. Besides her expertise, she's very kind and warm, which I always appreciate when I leave my body in someone else's hands.
I was also hoping that this week we could move into our new apartment. No luck, we haven't even signed the purchase agreement. The lawyers overlooking the purchase have taken forever to clear up one(1) thing for us, and until then we can't go to the notary, sign and present the down payment. We've lost almost three weeks, nothing has been done in that period thanks to them. The sellers, the buyers (Andrew and I), and the bank are not very happy about this, but our real state agent keeps pusing for an answer and we don't get any.
So fingers crossed we might move in in December? Jesus Fucking Christ, we signed our first papers in July. Those papers are actually about to expire this Tuesday. We might need to do it all over again.
Both getting a place of our own and having a child have turned out to be cursed processes for us. Nothing to do but be patient, I guess.
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