Freudian death-wishful fish, no water, no electricity and Lost Entry I, that was due for march.
Monday, 07/19/04 - 10:18 pm.

My stupid fish Freud jumped out of his tank this morning. Usually, I wouldn't call him stupid, because he's quite the opposite (as much as that's possible in a beta fish), but he deserves it this time. He fell on the floor and I tried to grab him, but he kept sliding and twisting. Freud, Sigmund that is, would surely blame this suicidal stunt on the unconscious death wish.

Did he die? Almost, but no, he didn't. His body is all slippery, you see, and for a split second that felt as a long time, I struggled, trying to grab him. I finally did, and, in my desperation, I violently threw him back in the tank. I thought it was too late, but he's ok. I think. Maybe he's injured, but he just won't tell me.

The lights went out last night, right after I finished my entry (so if something sucks more than usual in it, it's because I just couldn't edit it), and there was no electricity until 10 this morning. To add insult to the injury, the water service was suspended, too. Both things are sadly common here, but it's even more annoying when both happen at the same time.

I have a lot of things to say, or rather to complain about, but I won't. They're important things, but it's no use putting words to these thoughts of mine. Like my nephew Renan says, I must DO instead of TALK, so until I find a way of doing, I will remain silent...yeah, ok, I'm lazy, too.

Instead, I will just start posting my lost entries, the ones I typed offline while I was getting a new computer and the stupid internet service back. They're not really important, but I'd like to post them, just for me, just to fill the gap.

That week I complained about computers, and I talked a lot about guys, including the stranger known as DenimJacketGuy, who went on to become an acquaintance known as Trent, and then a boyfriend known as Joseph. But that's not on this following entry. I mean, no.

March 29, 2004.
Of offline computers and being all happily by oneself.

There's actually much more to getting a new computer than just buying it. I did not think about that until I had to clean up and unplug the old one. And then set up the new one. All that took me from 2 in the afternoon until 8 at night, when I accidentaly turned it on (I was going to wait until the Aerosmith bit on Dateline finished but I suck, and I accidentaly turned it on).

It's a nice computer of course, HP, Windows XP...I'm getting used to it, though last night I started to miss the old one. I don't, really. I'm glad we have a new one. Faster, with more space...

Unfortunately, I've been trying unsuccessfuly, for 24 hours now, to get to a human on the line of my internet provider company. It's been terrible, "press 1", "press 2", "press 9". Jesus. And finally someone gets on the line, but all he or she tells me is that they'll file a report and I'll get a call back. We've called the company about 10 times since last night. They called me once, at 7 in the morning today. They didn't solve a thing. "Maybe something's wrong with your hardware". MAYBE YOU SHOULD SEND SOMEONE OVER TO HELP ME!

Speaking of 7 in the morning...oh, yeah, I had to wake up at 7 in the morning, and maybe that's the reason why my stomach's been hurting all day (and even now, the pain won't cease). I have been really mad these past 24 hours, madder at the burocracy of the high companies than at the very annoying fact that I'm completely offline (and my dad didn't help to make me feel any better, either).

Oh, well. The anger of the morning was compensated with a nice meal at noon. I had to be early at the UCA, to get my new ID. I was all by myself, and the process was very quick. It was lunch time, so I walked across the campus, from one extreme to the other, left the university and bought something at Burger King. It's not big deal, because the entrance to the BK parking lot is like 27 steps away from the main UCA gate. Handy, very. But I made my order to go (yes, it included an apple pie, of course!) and I walked my way back, the about-27 steps to the UCA gate, and then all across the campus from other extreme to one, to find a nice, cozy place to eat at.

I enjoyed that a lot, that mealtime with myself. The weather was weird, too, cloudy and hot. It rained for a while. Noon was the best part of my day. I wish I was able to write every second of it as it's happening. I felt that thing people call "infinite".

Other things happened, but I have a lot of reading to do. Tomorrow is lab day and I have not studied properly. I am scaring myself. I could not stand it if my average dropped.

(Post script, about four months later -now-: "if my average dropped"...it did. I am such a loser)

(Post post script: I counted the steps from the entrance to the restaurant some time ago, in a scientific, reliable way...but I forgot the number *cough*)

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