I don't know....."weird"?
Friday, 01/24/03 - 7:01 pm.

Sometimes I feel I turn into different person everyday. Pretty much -as Simeon used to say- like me wearing a different personality everyday.

So last night, Alan arrived. He'll leave for good in a couple of months, and I really don't want to talk about that right now. The happy thing is all of his stories, all of the chances he's found in NY, etc. Oh, yeah, and he brought me Aerosmith's Pump CD (I have the tape, but it's completely worn out) and....a HUGE book about The Beatles. It's HUGE, it's complete...and the pics are lovely *heart*.

Speaking of which, my nephew Renan called me last night, asking for help. He'll do a school project about The Beatles, and asked me to send him all the info (even music) about them. Awwww, I've turned my nephew into a Beatles fan.

Something must be wrong, because I've tried for years to turn him into an Aerosmith fan and no such luck. I mean, he loves some songs and shit but with The Beatles it was love at first sight. (well, I have to have in mind that Aerosmith curses, and is full with sexual innuendos, which make them less attractive for a little child..."the band your mother warned you about"...OR, in my case: "the band your sister-in-law warned you about playing it for her children").


I used not to believe in chain letters, but something just happened. I got something saying that I should make a wish and then forward it to 5 people, so my wish would come true in X minutes (being X one's age). I didn't, of course. But I could swear it was 18 seconds until I got a call from Carmen.

Oh, no, she's coming tomorrow. She even asked me to stay the night!!! I don't want her here to spend the night, nothankyouverymuch. It's bad enough to have her a couple of hours complaining and complaining. I can't talk to her about anything, she's not a good listener. And she goes an on about God knows what...and she's a know-it-all, so I can't even give my opinion.

I went to get my DUI this morning. The DUI is some kind of personal ID. It was a quick progress, and I was at the UCA at around 10:00 am (I thought I'd be there at 11:30 am). I called Veronica to let her know I was there, in the cafeteria. I saw a lot of ESJ people. Veronica arrived about 5 minutes later, with Norman, Rod and D. Then I saw Cel. Then they just went away because they had classes (they'd been on recess). Until noon, I hung out with Pablo (he doesn't study at the UCA, and I didn't even ask him what in the world he could possibly be doing there), Irene and others. I saw them play volleyball.

And I cut. I got a new blade, and I had to use it. Don't ask why. I like it. I know I shouldn't, but I do. My arm bled a lot. Then I thought that, now that I'm 18, I can donate blood to any hospital. I'll probably do that any time soon.

So noon arrived. And I saw my friends again. When D was leaving, I was talking to Veronica. He made her kiss him goodbye in the cheek...he just turned his face around. Then he stood in front of me and did the same. I gave him a little kiss (*Simeon hums Walk This Way*)...and then he said: doitagain, doitagain. I was going to do it, but he turned his face the other way. I heard Veronica scream with surprise, and I supposed she thought he was going to kiss me. But no, he was just playing. He and I laughed. Honestly, I found it very funny. The whole scene. Specially Veronica's scream. And no, I wasn't feeling bad at all when he left.

Later though, Veronica told me that Norman and Fo are pushing him away (I'll leave the amusing story for some other day). I feel very bad for him. I even wanted to tell Veronica: oh, yeah, like you and Carmen did to me in 8th grade, but I couldn't (that wasn't the right moment, anyway). I really feel bad for him. I wish I could talk to him. We're just friends, you know? Just friends...

Sometimes I can't help feeling the End is near. First the earthquakes (5.6 richter here, 7.6 richter in Mexico), then war with Iraq, then the crazy weather here (it rained yesterday! Here it doesn't rain until april!) and there (as told by her and Alan -it seems in NY is way too cold to be late january-). Then...D calls me. That alone makes for a devastating cataclysm.

Yes, strangely enough, he called me last night.

I sent him an IM, saying could you do me a favor?. It wasn't important, just to tell Norman something. Well, he never replied, and I logged out. Minutes later, the phone rings and my brother goes: it's for you.

I wasn't surprised...well, a little bit above average, but not the level one could've expected. Probably because I thought we'd hang up in less than 3 minutes. I told him about the favor, and after that he said: hey, you know what... and we went on a tanget, and then it was from shallow subject to shallow subject until we hung up, around 20 minutes later. Well, that was fun. I wish we could do it more often.

You know, after all...I feel we're still friends. And that feels good. Err, that'll probably won't last, I think I'll end up going to bed crying tonight, as usual. But for the time being, that'll do to keep me in a good mood.

Even if it's a lie (deep down...I can't help thinking about this).

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