The neat and nasty o' the day.
Saturday, 03/04/06 - 9:29 pm.

First, the nasty moment of the day: my mom approaching to me (I'd seen her wandering around for a couple of minutes), telling me that if Joseph and I have some kind of relationship, which apparently we do, he should come to the house, to "reciprocate".

"Do you go into his house?", she asked. It didn't take a lot of effort for me to make a disgust face and voice "no!". She said she trusted me, blablabla, but one as a mother, blablabla, and he should come to the house, blablablabla. Ugh. I understand her point, but her conservativeness ruins everything.

My dad, on the other hand, is pretty open and asks me no questions. I say I'm going out, and we only talk about car schedules. I'm pretty sure my mom and dad have a -rather implicit- pact and he's as much aware as my mom is, but he keeps his distance. God bless the man, it'd suck to have to deal with both of them.

I don't know why I feel like crying over that conversation with my mom. It made me so bitter, perhaps something along the lines of "you were so cold and serious toward him when I brought him home the first time, and you still ask why I don't bring him back?!". I don't know. I feel powerless. Worse of all, my mom has probably made an opinion of the "young man" solely based on what she sees: I give him rides, he never comes to my house. I know, that's all the material she has to judge from, but still...she just never made me feel confident enough to go and tell her anything serious, to give her more material, so to speak.

It hurts me to say this, but I sort of have the need to say fuck you to my mom at the moment. And strangely enough, my dad gets a completely opposite reaction, for accepting I have new needs.

I guess I'm also upset because I actually wanted to bring Joseph [in]to my house before I got such a lecture from my parents. I wanted to get ahead, but now if he comes to my house it'll seem he does because my mom asked me to, and not because I wanted to show them how much I care about him.

Man, fuck this shit, I say.

Now I'm so bitter that I can't describe the good part of the day. That was spending a couple of hours with him in his bedroom, just talking and making out. He got a haircut, which is always a plus in my book. He's a handsome guy, and I honestly want to spend the rest of my life with him. He makes me feel so comfortable in every way.

*Sigh* Well. Joseph says he'll come over some day next week. But I'm still upset. Definitely the most at said fact, of my mom telling me to bring him home before I brought him home by my own choice.

Luckily, when I came back home, no questions were asked and life went on sweetly. My mom's been getting dizzy again, though (like the day my dad and brother rushed her to the hospital in the middle of the night), so I went with my dad to do the weekly grocery shopping. It was quite enjoyable. And also, I ran into ObeseGirl...my, I have not mentioned her since...about four years, since high school. It was a quick hello, but she started hyperventilating. That crazy chick, I love her.

Happier news: my computer runs smoothly now. Mister Technician came to take a look at it, and it was what I suspected, and a few people assured me: it was the stupid Panda Antivirus. I got rid of it -finally- and installed instead AVG Free, as suggested by Blackie (thank you!). Mister T could've saved the trouble of coming here if it was just to tell me that, since I had already figure it out. But it's ok, now I know this computer still has a life to live.

Oy.

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