Tuesday, 12/16/08 - 6:20 pm.
I spent the nicest time with my family this week. Sunday, it was my mom 70th birthday (and she seems at least a decade younger) and we went to the beach, per request of Brother #1, who was still around. It was awesome and I get the feeling we ate all day. Beach in the morning, restaurant by the seashore at noon, coffee place in the afternoon. And pizza place at night. Brother #1 got back home yesterday. It's great having him around.
On more recent news, Joseph came over today. It was all right; he gave me my christmas gift, I'm guessing it's a DVD. He came over as my friend, judging by how laid back he seemed, even in front of my dad. We caught up, he told me about his brother's wedding, his baby nephew, his cat and her newborn brood, his loose tooth. I had a few things to tell him, but my stories don't seem that interesting in comparison to his.
I invited him to have coffee so we could talk more privately. We kept talking about his life, my life...I might have given him the feeling that he doesn't fit in my life at the moment. Then again, I felt the same coming from him. We never discussed were we were as a couple, but he mentioned the word "friend" once so...I suppose I should start elaborating my mourning. I refuse to remove my Facebook status, though. I can't bring myself to do that.
I even felt replaced. That girl is still living at his house, and I think she'll stay there for good. Joseph's mom started to like her and she's like his sister. There's no romantic thing between Joseph and her, she's, simply put, a new member of the family. His mom still wants to see me so bad, Joseph says, so I'm not really replaced. But...you know, I felt like that for a little while. Like there's a new girl in my place (again, it's not like Joseph's parents don't miss me).
The best thing for us is to stay amicable, and we have. However, I wanted to tell him that even though I'm moving on with my life, there's still room in it for him. I think he'd say that's not true...and I wonder if it's true myself. If it isn't, I'd like to change that, but I don't know how...ok, yes, I should leave my parents' house, find a job, learn to live on my own and experiment. I haven't found a job to begin with.
I'll see him on thursday...or at least his mom and dad, for I have to give them their presents. I got cookies for them, and Joseph said I probably got him chocolates. Not at all. I got him a keyboard and a 4GB USB memory. He used to say he needed them, especially the keyboard because it's uncomfortable writing in his laptop in his desk. I'm crossing my fingers he doesn't have either of those.
I suppose it's justified that I begin to cry now.
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