Tragic girl-wise accident and sickness for the body and the soul.
Tuesday, 01/20/04 - 3:36 pm.

I woke up at 3 this morning, and didn't sleep until 8 am. Basically I had a "girl accident" and I was caught unprotected, so I spent the whole time in the bathroom, awake. That's all you need to know.

My mom took care of the problem at 8:30 and I got some sleep after taking a bath. While I was caught in the middle of the problem, I wasn't mad or anything. I thought of many things. I could've written a book about some specific thing. But when I finally got in the shower and noticed the mess, I started to cry and cry and curse and curse like an atheist. I was mad, I hate it when that happens, I HATE IT!

Then I went to bed and woke up at 11:30. I wasn't that mad by then, but I was sick. A slight headache, and the nose-ear-throat stuffing pain. I think it's because of the ceiling fan in my bedroom, because I didn't get sick in Houston. But I can't turn it off, or else mosquitoes suck your blood and zoom in your ear, it's awful.

So I'm sick. And I'm feeling unhappy and I hate myself. I don't feel like going depper on this. Maybe I'll write a book. I've discovered I get creative at 3 am. Geez, maybe I'm just a night creature. I try to make things flow during the day and nothing does, and then I feel stupid and unworthy and uncreative.

My friend Head sent me my haiku-horoscope for today:

Capricorn
Saturn is in the
House of Mars, and someone is
getting their ass kicked.

I think it's me.

He also said Aerosmith is playing in Winnipeg (he lives there) in march. Oh, God, this only gets better -sarcasm-.

I feel so whitered.

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